Alan Alda, 90, Says He and Wife Arlene Alda Talk About Death ‘All the Time’

Alan Alda, the celebrated actor renowned for his role as Hawkeye Pierce in the hit series M*A*S*H, has shared insights about his candid conversations surrounding death with his wife, Arlene Alda. Married since 1957, the couple has built a deep bond, often using humour to navigate the complexities of life, including the challenging subject of mortality.

In a recent discussion at an event held at 92NY in New York City, Alda, now 90, revealed that he and Arlene frequently discuss what life would look like for each of them if the other were to pass away. He recounted a memorable moment while driving with comedian Carl Reiner, whose wife had recently died. Alda expressed, “We talk all the time about what we would do if one of us died first,” he explained. This frank conversation, combined with a humorous incident during their drive along Sunset Boulevard, highlighted the couple’s ability to address profound themes light-heartedly.

Reflecting on his milestone birthday earlier this year, Alda shared the experience of celebrating turning 90. He reminisced about a meal in which a waiter presented him with a cupcake and led the restaurant patrons in singing “Happy Birthday, older gentleman.” “They kind of let you know,” he noted, a testament to his playful acceptance of ageing.

The Aldas’ romance began in a rather unusual way when they met at a party, where they found themselves sharing rum cake that had fallen on the floor. “We did eat the rum cake off the floor and were inseparable after that. But I was captivated by her even earlier,” Alda wrote on X. Arlene also reflected on their chemistry, recalling the evening as delightful, noting that boys from Manhattan typically did not date girls from the Bronx. “He took me home to the Bronx. Unheard of,” she remarked, a reminder of the serendipitous nature of their early connection.

Together, Alan and Arlene Alda have raised three daughters—Eve, Elizabeth, and Beatrice—and are proud grandparents. Alda’s journey in entertainment is marked by numerous accolades, including six Golden Globes and three Emmy Awards, primarily for his portrayal in M*A*S*H, which aired from 1972 to 1983. His impressive career also included an Oscar nomination for his role in Martin Scorsese’s The Aviator and an Emmy for his performance in The West Wing.

Throughout the years, Alda has maintained a commitment to authenticity in storytelling. In 1975, he discussed the importance of realism in family portrayals during an interview with PEOPLE. He noted how his own family life influenced his work on the sitcom We’ll Get By, reflecting on the relatable arguments between family members that mirrored those in his home.

Despite receiving a Parkinson’s diagnosis in 2015, Alda chose to keep it private until 2018. However, he has endeavoured to keep a positive perspective, saying, “My life hasn’t changed much. I just applied my curiosity to it.” Alda continues to be actively engaged in various pursuits, constantly seeking knowledge about his condition and the best ways to manage it.

Alda also remarked on the enduring affection he shares with Arlene, describing their connection as akin to “puppy love.” He emphasised that he does not extensively plan for the future, opting instead for a life filled with spontaneity and improvisation. “I just try to make the best of what’s in front of me,” he noted, a philosophy that reflects his optimistic approach to life.

The Aldas’ mutual support and open dialogue about serious topics highlight a profound partnership that has lasted over six decades. As they grow older together, their ability to discuss life, death, and everything in between reinforces the strong bond that has defined their enduring relationship.