In a recent TikTok video that has captured the attention of numerous social media users, influencer Sydney Paige Barker revealed her unusual approach to the wedding vows she plans to exchange with her fiancé, Brendan Berry. Barker, 29, publicly shared that she has created a list of phrases she deems overused and uninspired, which she hopes her partner will avoid on their special day.
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Barker’s video has gone viral, accumulating over 300,000 views as she elaborated on her “do not use” list for wedding vows. The influencer expressed her strong aversion to phrases she considers cliched or ‘corny’, stating that she wants their vows to be truly heartfelt rather than sounding like pre-written sentiments found in greetings cards.
Among the expressions Barker firmly wishes to eliminate are “we’ve had a lot of ups and downs” and “you are my rock.” She suggests that the first phrase implies myriad problems within a relationship, potentially hinting at infidelity or serious issues. “When I see a couple use this language, it signals to me that they may have gone through a rough patch where breaking up could have been on the table,” she explained.
Barker finds the phrase “you are my rock” equally unoriginal, describing it as sounding contrived and lacking in individuality. As she articulated, “I think he could come up with something better from his heart that is an original thought. Terms like ‘you are my human’ or ‘you are my person’ evoke the same lifeless sentiments as ‘you are my rock.’ They all feel very unoriginal.”
Additionally, Barker aims to sidestep phrases such as “you are my forever” and “a life full of laughter,” labelling them as uninspired and reminiscent of romanticised song lyrics. “There’s literally a song about that,” she pointed out, referencing a 2009 Daughtry track. “I want something that doesn’t echo a pop ballad.”
In her bid for originality, Barker even chose to exclude the popular saying “you’re my partner in crime.” She lamented the prevalence of these stock phrases in wedding speeches, arguing that they detract from the personal nature of the vows, insisting, “Everything needs to come from the heart.”
While Barker admitted her TikTok was light-hearted, she also acknowledged that her sentiments may resonate with others planning weddings. “I genuinely would cringe if he said any of these things at the altar,” she shared, calling for her fiancé to craft vows that are unique rather than repeating what many others have before him.
Barker’s candid opinions have provoked a spectrum of reactions on social media. Many users showed support for her ideals, while a few expressed their disagreement. “I was surprised by the passion surrounding this topic,” Barker commented. “Not everyone gets it, but that’s alright.”
The couple, who became engaged in July 2024, is set to tie the knot on March 14, 2026. Following the initial video’s success, Barker posted a follow-up that included even more phrases she would prefer her fiancé abstain from using. Among those added to her “banned” list are commonly cited expressions like “doing this crazy thing called life with you” and “I love you to the moon and back.”
Barker also scrutinised the phrase “we’ve been through hell and back,” clarifying that without a significant backstory of hardship, its usage may be disingenuous. “If you’re going to stand up and say these dramatic phrases, you should be prepared to share the details behind them,” she quipped, reinforcing her desire for authenticity.
Furthermore, Barker remains ambivalent regarding the phrase “you are my best friend,” admitting she feels that way about her fiancé but grappling with the struggle to express it in a more original manner. “I want to convey that feeling but without resorting to clichés,” she stated.
As she prepares for her upcoming nuptials, Barker is determined to ensure their wedding vows are meaningful and distinctive, underscoring her belief that every word spoken should carry a personal touch. Her quest for originality may certainly inspire other couples navigating the minefield of traditional wedding language, enriching their special day with genuine expression. In Barker’s own words, “I just want some originality, that’s all.”