Katherine Ryan, the Canadian comedian and television personality, has stirred a notable discussion regarding parental preferences after disclosing that her eldest daughter, Violet, is her favourite child. This revelation came during an episode of the podcast “Begin Again” hosted by Davina McCall, where Ryan candidly addressed her feelings about her four children.
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In a conversation recorded in October 2023, Ryan, 43, stated, “I can say it. Violet’s my favourite. She’s the firstborn daughter.” This straightforward admission sparked a mix of reactions from the public, with some listeners expressing shock and disapproval, while others showed support for her honesty. Ryan highlighted that she felt comfortable sharing her preference as it reflects her unique bond with Violet, who she welcomed from a previous relationship.

Ryan’s three other children—Fred, Fenna, and Holland—are from her marriage to Bobby Kootstra. In elaborating on her feelings, she remarked, “I don’t worry about it hurting my other children’s feelings because I go, ‘Those are nepo babies.’ Like, guess what? She’s my favourite.” Her comments suggest that she believes Violet’s upbringing was distinct due to being the firstborn, implying a special connection forged through shared life experiences.
The reactions to her remarks were polarising. Many critics took to social media to voice their disagreement, stating that a parent should not have a favourite child. One individual commented, “No, absolutely not, you cannot pick a favourite child… You love them equally for their own individual purposes.” Another parent chimed in, suggesting that even if they had similar feelings, they wouldn’t disclose them to their children.
Conversely, there were supporters who recognised Ryan’s perspective. A defender noted that Ryan likely feels a heightened sense of protectiveness towards Violet, given her circumstances. This commenter mentioned, “She’s more protective over the eldest because she doesn’t have a dad in her life and they went on the journey together, whereas the younger kids got the better version of her that had already achieved success.” This highlights the complexity of familial relationships, especially in blended families.
Further commentary suggested that acknowledging a favourite among one’s children is perhaps more common than many admit. “I think a lot of parents have a favourite child but it’s taboo to admit it,” remarked one supporter. They drew parallels to favourite relationships with parents, siblings, and even pets, highlighting that such feelings are part of human nature.
Katherine Ryan’s candidness resonates with a broader dialogue on parental relationships and the dynamics of sibling rivalry. By admitting her preference, she is challenging social norms and expectations surrounding parenting discussions. The fear of judgement might restrict many parents from expressing such sentiments openly, yet Ryan’s comments might provide a sense of validation for others who feel similarly.
Her openness can be seen as a reflection of modern parenting challenges, particularly in high-pressure environments where societal standards often dictate how one should behave as a parent. Ryan’s remarks may encourage parents to embrace honesty about their feelings, acknowledging the complexities of love and attachment that come with raising children in varied circumstances.
As this discussion unfolds, it remains evident that Katherine Ryan’s comments have tapped into a rich vein of sentiment surrounding parental love, preferences, and the realities of family dynamics. Whether through criticism or support, her revelations invite further exploration of what it means to be a parent in today’s world, where traditional norms are increasingly evolving.
