In her latest work, *Divide and Rule: Royal Women and Their Battles*, journalist Catherine Mayer explores the life of Princess Diana and how her innate compassion and idealistic view of love shaped her persona and relationships. The book delves into the complexities surrounding the late princess, shedding light on her formative years and her struggles within the British royal family.
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Mayer paints a vivid portrait of Diana, illustrating her as someone driven by empathy and a fervent belief in romance. This combination, she argues, not only endeared Diana to millions but also set her up for heartache, particularly in her tumultuous marriage to Prince Charles. Diana is depicted as someone who entered her marriage with hopes steeped in fairy-tale ideals, which clashed with the harsher realities of royal life.
The author reflects on Diana’s early years, pointing to her experiences at school as a foundational moment for her compassionate character. During voluntary service projects, Diana was tasked with visiting an elderly woman and dedicated extra time to her despite the minimal efforts of her peers. One friend recalls, “She was, without doubt, one of the most compassionate and empathetic people I’ve ever met.” This nurturing spirit continued throughout her life, evident in her groundbreaking work with HIV/AIDS patients in the late 1980s.
Indeed, one of Diana’s most defining moments came in 1987 when she famously held the hand of an AIDS patient, challenging the stigma surrounding the disease and its sufferers. This act, both powerful and poignant, played out in front of the cameras but was not merely for show; she frequently made private visits to those in need. Her warmth and willingness to embrace members of the public became a hallmark of her character, contrasting sharply with the emotional distance in her marriage to Charles.
Mayer suggests that Diana’s emotional openness was rooted in a desire for connection that started long before her royal duties began. The collapse of her parents’ marriage left lasting scars that influenced her own view of love and commitment. Diana’s mother, a romantic novelist, filled Diana’s childhood with fairy-tale notions of love, setting expectations that were unlikely to be met in real life. According to Mayer, Diana consumed her mother’s romance novels voraciously, which may have shaped her idealistic vision of relationships.
As her marriage approached, Diana faced rising tension and doubt. Just before her wedding, she reportedly confided in her sisters that she wished to call it off, realising the weight of what was about to transpire. However, the grandeur of the royal occasion, coupled with the visibility of her face adorning tea towels, pressed her into a corner. Her friends also noted signs of distress, describing Charles as anxious and fretful in the lead-up to the wedding, unaware of the emotional baggage he carried, notably his ties to Camilla Parker Bowles.
The resulting union, as Mayer narrates, became emblematic of two “damaged innocents” intertwining their lives. Both Diana and Charles entered marriage bearing their own burdens and faced the public scrutiny that came with it. Although they shared a commitment to serve the monarchy, their personal expectations created a chasm between them.
Mayer ultimately characterises their marriage as a product of its time, reflecting an institution grappling with modernity while being encumbered by its history. The wedding on July 29, 1981, became a focal point, representing not just a union of two individuals but also the complexities of royal expectations amidst personal turmoil.
As Catherine Mayer’s *Divide and Rule* is set for release on June 23, it promises to provide an in-depth examination of not only Princess Diana’s life but also the implications of her experiences on the wider royal narrative. Through the lens of compassion and romantic idealism, Mayer’s exploration of Diana highlights the discrepancies between public perception and private reality within the confines of royal duty.