**Memoir Reveals Intimate Memories of Robert F. Kennedy**
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In her new memoir, *First Great Sorrow: My Years With Robert F. Kennedy*, Donna Chaffee recounts her transformation from an eager high school graduate to a dedicated aide in one of America’s most storied political families. The book provides a unique perspective on Robert F. Kennedy (RFK) during some of the most tumultuous times in American history.
Chaffee was a senior at Hollywood High School when she was deeply affected by the assassination of President John F. Kennedy in 1963. In her own words, she describes this moment as a catalyst for her future path. “I decided that, in tribute to President Kennedy, I would devote my life to public service,” she recalls, noting that JFK was her hero. This commitment led her to pursue her studies at George Washington University, where she juggled her academic schedule to secure a position on Capitol Hill.
When RFK was elected as the junior senator from New York in 1964, Chaffee seized the opportunity and volunteered for his campaign. Her efforts soon earned her a paid position in the Senate’s mailroom, helping to manage the influx of correspondence that came with the role. “He took the time to get to know everyone,” Chaffee reflects on RFK’s personable nature, recalling the camaraderie among his large staff.
Eager to build a connection with the senator, Chaffee devised ways to be in his presence, using her break times to strategically intersect with him in the hallways of the Capitol. “I would time it so we would be leaving the office at the same time,” she remembers, which often resulted in him offering her rides home. This seemingly innocent routine grew more intimate as she cheekily requested daily goodbyes. Each time, RFK would oblige, kissing her on the cheek. “It became a routine… but for me, it never felt routine. I can’t deny it — it was exciting,” she admitted.
Despite the thrill of her interactions with RFK, Chaffee acknowledges the complexity of their relationship, especially in the context of age and marital status. With RFK being in his 40s and married with a growing family, some may view her actions as inappropriate. Nevertheless, Chaffee insists that her intentions were not flirtatious in nature but reflective of her vivacious personality. “I assumed that he didn’t mind, since he continued to offer me rides home,” she adds.
A notable turning point in their relationship occurred in 1966, following a chance reunion in San Francisco during a campaign event. After years apart, Chaffee’s bold request to be kissed goodbye shifted gears; RFK kissed her on the lips, sending her emotions into a whirlwind. Yet, despite the intimacy of the moment, she made a decision to leave without pursuing anything further, reflecting on the complicated nature of her feelings for him.
Chaffee’s story does not end there. In the lead-up to RFK’s campaign for the Democratic presidential nomination in 1968, their paths crossed again. During one event, RFK recognised her in the crowd and greeted her with a kiss once more—this time, without her having asked for it. Sadly, their reunion was short-lived as events took a tragic turn.
On the night of June 5, 1968, RFK was shot while celebrating victories in the California primary at the Ambassador Hotel in Los Angeles. “Initially, I think I was in a state of shock,” Chaffee recalls, describing the initial horror that engulfed her in the wake of the assassination. In the ensuing chaos, she found herself involved in coordinating his funeral plans, a role that plunged her into further sorrow and grief.
Chaffee married her first husband later that year, a decision she admits stemmed partly from a desire for companionship amid her grief. She reflects on how RFK’s death affected her deeply, sharing that it changed her life in ways she has yet to fully understand. The invitations to the Kennedy family home eventually ceased, leaving her with a lingering sense of loss.
Through her memoir, Chaffee seeks to honour RFK’s legacy while shedding light on her cherished memories. “When you Google RFK now, it’s three pages of RFK Jr.,” she laments, expressing concern that many forget RFK’s impactful life. In her writing, she hopes to remind readers of the man who championed public service and dedicated his life to fighting for justice and equality.
Chaffee’s book serves as both a tribute and a personal account of a young woman’s experience with one of the 20th century’s most influential figures. In the epilogue, she reflects on how RFK’s sacrifice continues to inspire her. “He was willing to give his life for what he believed in,” she writes, emphasising the enduring impact of her time spent with him.
*First Great Sorrow* is not merely a memoir; it is a testament to a friendship that flourished in the heart of political turmoil, and it offers insight into the continuing legacy of an American icon through the eyes of someone who admired him profoundly.