March heralds Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month, a poignant reminder for many, including Shay Martin, who is navigating the profound loss of her husband, Tanner, to colon cancer. Tanner passed away at the young age of 30 after a five-year battle with the disease, which he was diagnosed with at just 25. His journey provides a stark commentary on the rising prevalence of colorectal cancer, especially among young adults.
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Shay and Tanner shared their lives publicly across Instagram and TikTok, amassing over a million followers. Their social media content included updates on Tanner’s health, but it was Shay’s vigilant chronicling of her grief while he was still alive that struck a chord with many. Their online presence fostered a vibrant community, offering support and understanding through the darkness that cancer often brings.
In November 2024, amid the turmoil, Shay and Tanner received exciting news—they were expecting a baby. Despite their ongoing struggles with grief, fear, and anxiety, the couple declared their joy during an interview with PEOPLE, marking a significant moment of light in their challenging journey. Just weeks before Tanner’s passing, on May 15, Shay gave birth to their daughter, AmyLou, an embodiment of their love amidst the heartache.
Following Tanner’s death, Shay transformed their shared social media accounts into a space that both honours his memory and bears witness to her grief. Recently, she took a significant step in advocacy by addressing members of Congress on behalf of Fight Colorectal Cancer. Her aim was to highlight the real faces behind the statistics, such as the harrowing fact that over 50,000 individuals are expected to die from colon cancer each year in the United States. Furthermore, colorectal cancer has now become the leading cause of cancer-related deaths in adults under 50.
In an emotional essay published by PEOPLE, Shay reflected on Tanner’s impact on her life and the future of their daughter. She recalled how Tanner’s vibrant personality lives on through AmyLou, whose bedtime routines are accompanied by lullabies played from his phone, evoking memories of him singing to her. Shay carries Tanner’s legacy on her skin through tattoos that celebrate their shared love and life.
Shay’s mission now extends beyond her own grief; she aims to assist others facing similar situations through newfound digital content. She launched a podcast titled “Grief Witnessed”, where she engages with individuals who have experienced loss. Shay believes that sometimes, the most healing support comes not from advice, but from simply listening to one another’s stories.
The community of young widows that Shay has connected with reflects a unique understanding of her situation, providing a safe space for shared experiences without judgement. They support each other in navigating their grief, fostering an environment that promotes both healing and acceptance.
During her recent trip to Washington, D.C., Shay felt a deep sense of purpose as she advocated for greater awareness and resources for colorectal cancer. Initially wary, she found strength in knowing Tanner was with her in spirit, bolstering her confidence to share their story. This advocacy opportunity highlighted the urgent need for funding research into colorectal cancer— a critical initiative given that this disease is the only major cancer killer without a dedicated federal research programme.
Shay’s journey has highlighted the simple yet profound reality that cancer affects nearly everyone in some way, transcending age and background. She observed, with palpable sadness, how many people remain unaware of the signs and implications of colorectal cancer. Educating the public has become a vital aspect of her advocacy, as she tirelessly works to ensure Tanner’s legacy leads to increased awareness and earlier detection of this disease.
Amidst her campaign to champion awareness, Shay reminds readers of the power of practical support for those affected by cancer. Rather than asking how to help, she encourages friends and family to act—be it helping with household tasks, offering meals or simply checking in. Moreover, she stresses the importance of acknowledging caregivers, who often face their own struggles alongside patients.
Shay’s commitment to keeping Tanner’s memory alive through social media, advocacy, and storytelling is a testament to their shared love. She aspires to raise AmyLou in an environment where Tanner’s spirit is celebrated, teaching her the joy of life and the importance of love. Shay’s hope is that by continuing to share Tanner’s story, she can instil a sense of connection for AmyLou, ensuring she knows her father’s love and legacy.
Ultimately, Shay’s advocacy represents a heartfelt plea for recognition and compassion in the face of adversity. She aspires for Tanner’s legacy to inspire others to embrace life’s moments fully and love deeply, ensuring that his spirit and message endure long into the future.