Renowned author George M. Johnson, celebrated for their work *All Boys Aren’t Blue*, has launched their debut adult memoir titled *And If I Die Before I Wake*. This new release invites readers on a poignant journey spanning 15 years, marked by the challenges of navigating nationwide book bans, coping with an HIV diagnosis, battling addiction, and enduring profound loss. With this memoir, Johnson aims to share their experiences while fostering introspection among readers.
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The inspiration for the memoir stemmed from Johnson’s experiences mentoring younger individuals in the LGBTQ+ community. They found themselves unexpectedly assuming a parental role, “basically raising a 25-year-old from the ballroom community.” This experience was transformative, compelling Johnson to transition from a mentoring figure to a storyteller. “I could put it in a book for them, of what my journey was,” they expressed, emphasising that the genesis of the memoir was rooted in a desire to guide and share wisdom.
Johnson’s engagement with younger individuals profoundly influenced the narrative of *And If I Die Before I Wake*. They felt an obligation to unearth and articulate the stories of their trials and triumphs, presenting a more intricate side of themselves, often referred to as Matthew, their middle name. “I specifically think this one was tougher,” Johnson remarked, highlighting how the memoir is framed from a more personal and intimate perspective.
In crafting this memoir, Johnson committed to authenticity, electing to share their truth without sanitisation. They noted, “I could have given them a very sanitized version of me, a much more presentable version, but I wanted them to see me in totality.” This approach underscores Johnson’s belief that everyone has unspoken struggles that shape their identities. By presenting their story in a raw manner, Johnson hopes to encourage readers to confront and process their own life experiences.
Reflecting on the past, Johnson noted how their experiences have reshaped their outlook on life as they approach their fortieth birthday. They articulated that surviving various hardships has provided a different lens through which to view future challenges. “To be 40 and be able to reflect on all of those times that I survived something that a friend maybe didn’t… does change your perspective,” they explained.
Despite the often heavy themes, *And If I Die Before I Wake* balances sorrow with levity. Johnson shared a poignant memory from their grandmother’s funeral preparations, where moments of laughter intertwined with grief. “There are always good moments still, in most bad days,” they confided, conveying a universal truth about the coexistence of joy and sorrow.
As *And If I Die Before I Wake* becomes available, Johnson expresses hope that it will resonate deeply with readers, prompting them to reflect on their journeys. By sharing their struggles and triumphs, Johnson aims to create a space for others to explore their own identities and experiences.
In a world where many stories remain untold, Johnson’s memoir seeks to remind readers that vulnerabilities are part of the human experience. With their candid storytelling, Johnson not only brings visibility to their journey but also opens the door for meaningful dialogues about acceptance, identity, and resilience in the face of adversity.
*And If I Die Before I Wake* is now available for purchase at bookstores and online retailers, inviting readers to engage with Johnson’s powerful narrative. Johnson’s message is clear: everyone has a story worthy of being told, and in sharing those stories, we can find solidarity and understanding amidst life’s complexities.
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