Prince Harry Says He Suffered Panic Attacks on His Way to Work: ‘I Felt Like I Was Suffocating’

Prince Harry, the Duke of Sussex, has shared an intimate account of how grief has profoundly impacted his life in a recent episode of MasterClass. Titled “Redefining Grief: Building Resilience Through Loss,” the episode features a discussion between Harry and neuroscientist Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor, where they delve into the complex emotional and physiological effects of grief.

Harry’s journey through grief traces back to the tragic passing of his mother, Princess Diana, when he was just 12 years old. In the MasterClass, he candidly revealed that he spent years repressing his emotions surrounding her death. He admitted this suppression resulted in severe bouts of anxiety and depression, a pattern that manifested throughout his formative years.

Reflecting on the profound impact of his mother’s death, Harry recalled how the world viewed him with compassion, leading him to feel a burden to portray an image of resilience. “People looked at me and thought, ‘How’s he doing? Is he okay?’” he said. This pressure to respond with “I’m fine” led to long periods of emotional numbness.

As a teenager, Harry sought distraction through adrenaline-fueled activities, ultimately joining the military at the age of 20. He described military service as a vital way to escape his emotional turmoil and forge an identity beyond being a grieving son. Wearing the uniform, he felt part of a team rather than just “the prince who lost his mum.” The supportive structure of military life provided him with a sense of purpose that was temporarily stabilising.

However, following his military career, unresolved grief resurfaced. Upon returning from a tour in Afghanistan in 2013, Harry encountered symptoms of post-traumatic stress. He discovered that the experiences of war acted as a trigger for emotions tied to his mother’s death, causing him to confront the reality of his long-ignored grief.

In a particularly revealing moment, Harry shared the debilitating panic attacks he began to experience, even during routine tasks like putting on a shirt. This alarming realisation prompted him to recognise the depth of his unresolved issues and the necessity of addressing his emotional health.

Harry’s struggle continued into his personal life, especially during his time spent away from the royal family. Following his move to Canada with Meghan Markle, he encountered another wave of grief and anxiety. He recounted how the absence of royal structure led to an adrenaline crash, which compounded his mental health challenges and forced him to confront his emotional state for the first time.

Dr. O’Connor shed light on the physical toll of Harry’s unresolved grief, explaining that the persistence of despair plays a critical role in the healing process. “It is there to have us stop searching for someone who’s not coming back,” she said, highlighting the importance of allowing oneself to grieve fully.

Harry reflected on the complicated relationship he had with his emotions, confessing that he battled feelings of guilt about moving forward with his life. He held a belief that finding happiness without his mother would equate to betrayal—a notion that he ultimately realised was misguided. The profound shift came when he understood that Diana would have wanted him to embrace joy.

This newfound perspective has reshaped the way Harry engages with his mother’s legacy. He remarked, “Everything I do, I hope she would be proud of.” He now sees a connection between his work and Diana’s charitable pursuits, believing that he carries her spirit within him.

As Harry continues his journey of healing, he has found solace in recognising his mother’s presence in daily life. He described moments of clarity and connection that bring him joy, suggesting that Diana continues to influence and inspire him from beyond.

In conclusion, Prince Harry’s openness about his struggles with grief serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of addressing emotional health. His candid revelations in the MasterClass not only contribute to a broader dialogue about grief but also demonstrate the resilience that can emerge from confronting pain and seeking healing.