Vycki Higley, a resident of Danbury, Connecticut, continues to feel the enduring presence of her late husband, Robert Higley, who tragically lost his life in the September 11 terrorist attacks in New York City. Their story is a poignant testament to love, resilience, and the memory of those we hold dear.
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Rob, an insurance executive with Aon, was just 29 years old when he perished in the attacks, leaving behind a young family, including a four-year-old daughter, Amanda, and an unborn child, Robyn. Today, Vycki reflects on the joy and heartache of raising their girls without their father, embracing the moments that keep Rob’s spirit alive through their children.
One highlight in Vycki’s life is the weekly sleepovers with her granddaughter, Ruby, who is now eight years old. Vycki’s bond with Ruby grows stronger every Friday night as they create cherished memories together. The little girl, described by her grandmother as quirky and funny with a “heart of gold,” serves as a living reminder of Rob. “They’re just spitting images of each other,” Vycki says, encapsulating the bittersweet joy of reminiscing about her late husband.
The past year has been particularly significant for the Higley family. Amanda tied the knot with her long-time partner, D.J. Luongo, in September, while Robyn married Ryan Gilbert the following April. Concurrently, Vycki, who divorced her second husband in 2019, married Manny Cambra in a small ceremony at Jesse Lee Church—where she and Rob had exchanged vows in 1994. “It’s been a whirlwind of a year,” Vycki remarks, adding, “I wish he was here for all of it.”
Despite the celebrations marking these new beginnings, Rob’s absence was deeply felt. With Amanda’s wedding occurring just days before the 24th anniversary of the tragic attacks, the emotions ran high. Vycki made a heartfelt reference to Rob during her wedding speech, thanking attendees for their unwavering support throughout the years. During the celebrations, she and her daughters shared a special moment, dancing to “I’m Already There,” a song resonating with their family’s journey.
Ruby, who was recently diagnosed with autism, is a vibrant presence in the family. Vycki describes her granddaughter as someone who “sings and dances wherever she goes,” with an unwavering passion for creative activities like drawing and colouring. Currently, Ruby is unaware of the specifics surrounding her grandfather’s death, knowing only that he is “in heaven.” Vycki gently explains, “Grandpa Robbie is in heaven.”
As time passes, Vycki has discovered new ways to cope with the profound loss of her college sweetheart. “I talk about it differently now. I’m in a much better place,” she shares, emphasising her journey away from victimhood towards empowerment and healing. Her experience reflects a broader resilience, showcasing how the passage of time can facilitate emotional transformation.
Watching her daughters carve out their futures and seeing reflections of Rob in Ruby has provided Vycki with an unexpected sense of peace. She expresses her gratitude for the life they are building together, acknowledging that while they experience difficult days, the strength of their family bond—a connection strengthened by love and memory—is a frequent source of comfort.
In her poignant reflections, Vycki Higley encapsulates the essence of perseverance and familial love. “I never thought we could get to a point where we would be standing so strongly,” she remarks. Ultimately, she expresses unwavering gratitude for the moments of joy in her life, driven by the cherished memories of Rob, demonstrating that love continues to thrive even in the face of devastating loss.