A mother from Wales is grappling with her son’s desire for an assisted death following a long battle with terminal illness. Shelley Herniman, 43, is supporting her 20-year-old son, Noah, who was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumour during the COVID-19 pandemic. After more than a year of intense chemotherapy, Noah’s health has deteriorated significantly, leaving both him and his mother facing unimaginable decisions.
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Noah’s battle with cancer began when he was just 15 years old. He was subjected to a rigorous treatment plan, although he only managed to complete 74 out of the anticipated 80 weeks of chemotherapy. The treatment supposed to prolong his life severely impacted his quality of life, forcing him to rely on feeding tubes and a wheelchair. With a weight of only 115 lbs, Noah’s physical condition has left a profound effect on both him and his family.
“It’s been phenomenal what he has endured,” Shelley Herniman explained in an interview. Over time, she observed the toll the illness and treatments were taking on her son, adding, “I’ve seen him when it’s bad. There was a time I didn’t think he was coming home because of the sheer pain he was in.”
Initially, when Noah voiced the wish to travel abroad for an assisted death, Shelley dismissed the idea. She admits to having had “conversations that no parent should have to have” with her son about death. However, after months of research and dialogue regarding assisted dying, she began to understand Noah’s perspective. “I brought him into the world and I don’t want to take him out of it, but I sure as hell don’t want to see him suffer,” she reflected.
Although Noah’s condition is currently deemed “stable,” his prognosis is uncertain. Shelley fears that if his illness progresses, it could result in an extremely painful decline, stripping him of his independence and ability to communicate. “That’s not dignified,” she stated, expressing concern about the scenarios they might face in the future.
The painful reality of Noah’s illness has led Shelley to reconsider her position on assisted dying. She stated, “Have I got a plan? Hopefully, I’ll never have to. But the reality is, if Noah was at that point and there were options out there, I wouldn’t say no. Would I like to see it in our own country? Yes.” Currently, assisted dying remains illegal in the UK, but there are discussions within Parliament regarding potential legislation to allow for it under strict guidelines.
Noah himself expressed that the thought of dying is “terrifying,” but having autonomy over his final moments would allow him to “die with dignity.” He articulated his wish, saying, “One day the tumour is going to grow to a point where it’s the beginning of the end… I don’t want to go for a slow, agonising death where I can’t do anything myself.” Noah longs for the opportunity to choose a quick and painless conclusion rather than endure a prolonged period of anguish filled with uncertainty.
In June 2025, the British Parliament voted in favour of a bill aiming to legalise assisted dying for terminally ill individuals. The “Terminally Ill Adults (End of Life)” Bill would permit adults over 18 who are mentally competent and diagnosed with a terminal illness, with six months or less to live, to end their lives with medical assistance. The bill is currently awaiting review by the House of Lords.
The Hernimans’ harrowing journey encapsulates the broader debate surrounding end-of-life choices, particularly in the context of terminal illness. As societies grapple with the moral implications of assisted dying, stories like Noah’s bring into focus the unthinkable decisions families face when confronted with suffering and illness.