Mariah Carey Reveals Her ‘Coping Mechanism’ to Deal with ‘Angry’ Feelings About Marriage to Ex-Husband Tommy Mottola

Mariah Carey Opens Up About Coping with Past Marriage to Tommy Mottola

In a recent interview with Harper’s Bazaar UK for the September 2025 issue, Mariah Carey shared her thoughts and feelings about her marriage to Tommy Mottola and how she manages the complex emotions associated with it. The iconic singer, known for hits like “Obsessed,” was married to Mottola from 1993 to 1998, during which time their relationship faced various challenges.

Carey, now 56 years old, expressed that while she still experiences moments of anger when reflecting on that period of her life, she has come to terms with it. She explained, “Sometimes I feel angry about that time, but I think I’ve made peace with it — in any case, I vowed I’d stop talking about it.” The Grammy winner highlighted how humour serves as her coping mechanism, enabling her to find lightheartedness in what could otherwise be a sombre narrative. She added, “Humor is my release, and people who know me know that… I’ll make little jokes about what happened because otherwise I could make every day a sob story. It’s a coping mechanism, but it’s in my nature to laugh.”

Mariah Carey’s relationship with Tommy Mottola began in 1991 when he was the head of Sony Music, leading to their grand wedding in 1993. However, their marriage faced strains related to Carey’s desire to explore and create more R&B and urban music. She revealed in the interview, “I wanted to do more R&B, more urban music, and any time I would bring that up, it would get shot down… It wasn’t that I didn’t like the music I was making – I just felt there was more inside me that I wanted to release.” This artistic struggle added another layer of complexity to their already intricate relationship.

Despite their public divorce in 1998, the impact of their marriage continued to resonate in Carey’s life and music. She shared insights into her experience in a 2019 interview with Cosmopolitan, shedding light on the restrictive nature of her image during that time. Referring to herself as a “child bride,” Carey described feeling controlled and devoid of personal freedom. She expressed, “There was a conscious effort to keep me as this all-American, whatever that means, girl. It was very controlled. There was no freedom for me as a human being. It was almost like being a prisoner.”

Tommy Mottola, the former head of Sony Music and Carey’s ex-husband, also delved into their relationship in his 2013 memoir, ‘Hitmaker: The Man and His Music.’ He revealed that their connection suffered a significant blow when Carey was excluded from the 1996 Grammy Awards, where she had multiple nominations. This event, which marked a pinnacle of recognition for Carey’s talent, instead highlighted the growing distance between them, as recounted by Mottola in his memoir.

Their shared history and the tumultuous dynamics of their relationship were further reflected in Mottola’s descriptions of their home in Bedford, N.Y. He referred to the residence as “Sing Sing,” drawing a parallel between the opulent mansion and the eponymous prison. This metaphor encapsulated the sense of confinement and constraint that Carey felt during that chapter of her life, as vividly portrayed in Mottola’s memoir.

As Mariah Carey prepares for the release of her new album, ‘Here for It All,’ in September, her revelations about her past marriage to Tommy Mottola provide a poignant backdrop to her music and personal journey. The themes of resilience, self-discovery, and growth intertwined with her experiences offer a glimpse into the complexities of fame, relationships, and artistic expression. Despite the challenges faced during her time with Mottola, Carey’s ability to find humour and solace reflects her enduring strength and authenticity as a celebrated artist.

In conclusion, Mariah Carey’s candid reflections on her past marriage serve as a testament to her resilience and ability to navigate through personal trials with grace and humour. As she prepares to share her new music with the world, her story continues to resonate with fans and audiences, offering a glimpse into the multifaceted layers of her artistry and life journey.