No, I Didn’t “Forget” to Have Children: ‘Turns Out I Wanted to Feel Worthy of Love More Than I Wanted a Child’ (Exclusive) 

No, I Didn’t ‘Forget’ to Have Children — Here’s How I Decided (Exclusive)

Author Sarah Gormley shares her journey and the realisation that shaped her decision not to have children

Sarah Gormley, a writer and gallery owner residing in Columbus, Ohio, opens up about her choice not to have children and the profound self-discovery it brought about. Her published memoir ‘The Order of Things’ sheds light on her personal journey and the emotional intricacies behind her decision-making process.

As a single woman in her late 30s and early 40s, Gormley often encountered puzzled looks and questions implying she had forgotten to have children. Despite societal expectations and personal desires, she gracefully navigated these interactions while grappling with her own feelings on the matter.

Gormley candidly acknowledges the internal struggle she faced daily, acknowledging the deep yearning for motherhood while realising the emotional weight of not experiencing a love as unique and profound as that between a parent and child.

Reflecting on her aspirations to have a daughter named Henry Cameron Gormley, she delves into the dreams and fantasies that shaped her younger self’s vision of motherhood. The longing for familial connection and the desire to create a loving home were constants in her life, driving her choices and ambitions.

Throughout her 20s, Gormley envisioned a future where she would follow in her mother’s footsteps, creating a family with a partner and fulfilling the traditional role of a wife and mother. However, life took an unexpected turn, leading her on a path of introspection and self-discovery.

Facing the reality of her biological clock ticking, Gormley explored options like IVF and single motherhood but came to a profound realisation. She recognised that her true desire was not just to have a child but to share that experience with a loved one, a partner who would join her in the journey of parenthood.

Gormley’s introspective journey led her to prioritise her own self-worth and emotional fulfilment over societal expectations or biological urges. In a moment of reflection on her terrace in Chelsea, she found solace in accepting her decision and embracing the strength it took to prioritise her emotional well-being.

Ultimately, Gormley’s story is a testament to the power of self-discovery and the courage it takes to follow one’s heart, even when it means deviating from societal norms. Her memoir serves as a source of inspiration for those grappling with similar decisions, offering a glimpse into the complex emotions that accompany such profound life choices.

In a world where motherhood is often seen as the ultimate fulfilment for women, Gormley’s story challenges conventional beliefs and highlights the importance of following one’s inner truth, even when it means walking a path less travelled.