Carolyn Bessette’s Sister Lisa ‘Slammed Down the Phone’ When Ed Schlossberg Said RFK Jr. Couldn’t Eulogize a ‘Non-Kennedy’ at the Memorial (Exclusive)

A new biography titled “RFK, Jr.: The Fall and Rise” by Isabel Vincent sheds light on the tumultuous aftermath of the tragic 1999 plane crash that claimed the lives of John F. Kennedy Jr., his wife Carolyn Bessette Kennedy, and her sister Lauren Bessette. Among the poignant revelations in the book is the close bond between Robert F. Kennedy Jr. (RFK Jr.) and his cousin JFK Jr. The biography draws on RFK Jr.’s personal diaries, which became available after the death of his second wife, Mary Richardson Kennedy, in 2012.

The narrative begins on the night of July 16, 1999, when RFK Jr. was in Hyannis Port, anxiously awaiting John’s arrival. As the hours passed, he learned that the plane had disappeared, and unfortunately, he soon resigned himself to the terrible truth: “Then I knew that they were dead,” he wrote in his diary.

In the days following the crash, a serious dispute arose over burial arrangements between the Kennedy and Bessette families. Ann Freeman, the mother of Carolyn and Lauren Bessette, voiced her desire for her daughters to be interred in Connecticut. However, this proposal faced opposition, as it was deemed unsuitable due to John’s lack of direct connection to Greenwich.

RFK Jr. comes across as a sympathetic figure in the conflict, particularly towards Ann Freeman, amid her unimaginable loss. The author notes his understanding of the immense grief she was experiencing over losing two daughters in such a tragic manner. Nonetheless, the tension was palpable, particularly during a conference call that included Ed Schlossberg, Caroline Kennedy’s husband, and Ann Freeman. The goal was to reach a consensus on who would eulogise the deceased.

The families ultimately decided that Ted Kennedy would deliver the eulogy for his nephew John, while Hamilton South, a close friend of Carolyn, would honour her memory. Meanwhile, Lisa Bessette, Carolyn’s sister, suggested RFK Jr. should eulogise them both, given his deep connection to the couple. However, Schlossberg strongly opposed the idea, asserting that “Kennedys do not eulogise non-Kennedys,” as recounted in RFK Jr.’s diary.

Lisa’s disgust at Schlossberg’s stance prompted a heated exchange, culminating in her asking if he had “made up the rules on the spot” before abruptly hanging up. This incident casts Schlossberg in an unfavourable light within the context of RFK Jr.’s reflections on the events.

Following much deliberation, the families eventually settled on a burial at sea for the three individuals whose lives ended so tragically, with their ashes scattered in the Atlantic close to the site of the crash. Despite the earlier discord, RFK Jr. later managed to speak at a memorial service in Connecticut dedicated to John, Carolyn, and Lauren.

In his eulogy, RFK Jr. poignantly described the burial at sea, recalling how their remains were placed in three blue Tiffany boxes, and visualised the moment when the ashes were released: “it was like so many ghosts.” His eloquence provided a glimpse of the profound grief felt by those left behind.

Months after the devastating losses, RFK Jr. returned to the Kennedy family compound in Hyannis Port. In August, the once vibrant location felt desolate without his cousin. Memories flooded back of happier times — the playful antics of dressing up in costumes to entertain younger cousins, shared dinners, and simple moments spent together. Reflecting on the loss, he quoted Alfred Lord Tennyson’s poem: “Things fall apart,” encapsulating the deep sorrow that lingered in the absence of family.

“RFK, Jr.: The Fall and Rise” is set to be released on April 14 and will be available for pre-order at various book retailers. This account promises to reveal not only the event’s emotional toll on the families involved but also the complex interplay of grief, love, and familial loyalty that surrounded one of America’s most storied family tragedies.