A wedding guest was left feeling bewildered and somewhat neglected after being invited to attend the ceremony and reception, but not the dinner that took place in between the two events. This unusual situation was shared on Reddit’s “Wedding Shaming” forum by the guest, who disclosed being long-time friends with both the bride and groom, having originally met during their freshman year at college. Following eight years of dating, the couple eventually got engaged and decided to tie the knot.
:max_bytes(150000):strip_icc():format(jpeg)/bridesmaid-destination-wedding-031124-1-1b5e8577c7d44a27946fe0f67593809b.jpg)
The guest recounted being invited to the church ceremony, scheduled from 3 p.m. to 4 p.m., as well as the reception set to commence at 9 p.m. They noted that most other guests were only invited to either the ceremony or the reception, which left them puzzled. Subsequently, the guest was taken aback upon discovering that there was a dinner arranged by the newlyweds before the reception. Initially assuming it would be an intimate affair strictly for the bridal party, they were surprised to find around 40 attendees, including members of their university friend group, partaking in the meal.


With nearly five hours to fill and no dinner provided, the guest found themselves exploring the city to find a sandwich, which they then ate alone in the cold before heading to the party. Upon arriving at the reception, the guest described feeling a sense of unease despite the warm and welcoming atmosphere. The disparity of being left to fend for themselves while others enjoyed a meal together made the guest question the overall situation and their place in it.
The Reddit post garnered responses from various users questioning the decision of the bride and groom. Some speculated that financial constraints may have led to the exclusion of certain guests from the dinner, while others condemned the situation as disrespectful and inconsiderate. One commenter suggested that the couple may not have fully considered the implications of their wedding day schedule and the experience of their guests, explaining that it likely wasn’t a personal affront but rather an oversight.
Several users highlighted cultural differences in wedding customs, pointing out that in countries like the Netherlands and the U.K., it is not uncommon for couples to have a small dinner gathering with select guests between the ceremony and reception. Despite this, critics argued that the lack of transparency or communication about the dinner arrangement was ill-advised and could have been handled more tactfully to avoid causing discomfort or confusion among attendees.
In hindsight, the guest’s experience raises questions about the importance of clear communication and consideration for guests’ experiences when planning wedding events. Transparency in wedding invitations and schedules can help manage expectations and ensure that all attendees feel valued and included throughout the celebration. As with any social gathering, thoughtful planning and communication are key to creating a positive and memorable experience for all involved.
